There are two opposing and fundamentally wrong opinions regarding the proliferation of dating sites on the Internet.
Opinion number one: Dating sites attract sweet, attractive people with sensitive, vulnerable souls and highly organized psyches. These people reject vulgar encounters in minibuses. When meeting someone of the opposite sex on the streets of big cities, they shyly cover their faces (some with burqas, others with bare hands). In libraries, they prefer to read books rather than gaze at their neighbors' busts, legs, or muscular torsos.
Their acquaintances are all family-oriented, and ninety percent of their coworkers are approaching retirement age. Shy, unsociable, but kind on the inside, they see no other choice but to turn to a virtual service where they can get to know their interlocutor better before entrusting their fragile selves to them.
Opinion two. These sites are a gathering place for deranged perverts, maniacs, sugar daddies, mommies, sluts, gigolos, bluestockings, and nerdy, pimply teenagers who ask for photos to satisfy their curiosity (or whatever else). Any normal person, upon registering on the site, is immediately inundated with spam offers to lick, watch, or spend the evening in a quiet, calm, and preferably intimate setting. Besides real psychos and women of easy virtue, these sites are overflowing with virtual accounts trying to trick you into sex, money, and blowing kisses, while also relentlessly attacking your computer with hundreds of viruses and Trojans. Welcome!
A reasonable person understands that none of the above statements can be true by definition, because dating sites are created by people for people, and nothing human is alien to them. In other words, whether at a party at a club, on the street, or on a crowded bus, we encounter normal people, boors, promiscuous women, shy bespectacled men, and beautiful, romantically inclined, but dim-witted girls. Each person present pursues their own, well-known goals. Of course, there are individuals who found themselves on the site by accident, under duress, or in a state of short-term amnesia. Their profiles hang lonely in the back rows, quietly rotting under the barrage of more recent and relevant profiles.
Let's start with the fact that every newcomer has the opportunity not only to clearly specify their personal parameters (height, weight, genital tattoo, and whether they have a facial or facial expression), but also to indicate (usually from a selection of categories) their purpose for being on that particular site. So, friends, if you've joined a dating site looking for a mistress while your wife and kids are vacationing in the south, and you've selected “Marriage/Family Starting” in the section, don't be surprised if your tempting invitations to visit are met with scorn and incomprehension.
Likewise, women looking for a serious relationship shouldn't select “One-night stands” or, under “Sexual Preferences,” list “Group Sex” without hesitation. These parameters are pre-set in the search, so expect to see relevant offers.
Many people mistakenly believe that dating sites are places where you can find a partner for the night in just one languid evening, and during the workday, find a faithful husband, a handsome lover, a sponsor, or that one, the one and only. Of course, hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands of profiles, photos, videos, personal blogs, and a sea of other information create the illusion of an easy and quick mission to find your soulmate. Whether it's for the night or for life, it doesn't matter.
Experience shows that the people on the other end of the line are just like you. They're usually lonely, sometimes disappointed in previous relationships, looking for adventure or eager to open their hearts to a stranger (which is always easier), and always hesitant. Some write with mistakes, some are often distracted by work or household chores, and some remain stubbornly silent, responding to your winks and “hellos” only after a couple of days. Sometimes a conversation strikes up, and you peer into the chat window with interest, anxiously awaiting the other person's next remark. Sometimes the introduction doesn't click, and your detailed questions are met with monosyllabic answers that don't encourage further conversation.
The biggest mistake every user of such resources makes is that we (myself included) somehow forget that a website isn't a panacea, a cure for boredom; it's merely a bridge to communication. A list of photos with descriptions. A list of parameters we're interested in. At best, a way to discover mutual interests and set a date and place to meet. That's it! I've personally encountered people of both sexes on websites who never even considered turning their virtual connections into something real. They were perfectly content with exchanging daily messages with a dozen people about the weather, politics, and salary arrears. They came to the site not to meet new people, but to usefully spend time. And more often than not, to kill time. What's the point of endlessly typing if your conversation partner isn't even thinking about inviting you out for a cup of coffee?
It's common knowledge that the internet, like paper, will tolerate anything. Our virtual friends seem beautiful, well-groomed, and friendly, ready to help (on payday), help with a crossword puzzle, or link to a hilarious video. It's no wonder that, after filling our profiles with tons of contacts, we often forget what a heartfelt conversation we had with Ksyusha last week, how Masha invited us to the movies, and how Kolya, it turns out, is a scumbag traveling on a business trip, pretending to be an exchange student. Many people often spruce up their two-year-old photos, or worse, post an image of an unknown model on their profiles, while adding a depressing caption in their profile: “This isn't my photo. Message me, I'll send it.” It's hard to tell what lies behind this: universal modesty or the secrecy of a spy.
So is it evil or necessity? Drumroll, please!
Neither. Did you know that Mamba alone, one of the largest dating sites on the RuNet with a claimed number of over 12 million “couples,” has several thousand satellite sites that offer the same services through affiliate programs? As long as homo sapiens crave communication, sex, friendship, or social connections, such sites will thrive and, incidentally, earn a pretty penny from their humble users. However, recently, a healthy slice of their bread has been eaten away by social media, where people more often publish real information, meaning the risk of being scammed is significantly lower. Can our desire to arrange our personal lives be considered evil?
Speaking of necessity, imagine a situation where you're running around like a squirrel in a wheel at work every day. Yes, despite popular belief, not all office workers equipped with computers come to work just to wear holes in their pants. What if neither you nor your management approves of office romances, your library has been replaced by an e-reader, and public transportation by the comfort of your own car? And you prefer to drink hard liquor at home, and only dare to dance to music in front of your bedroom mirror?
Are dating sites really necessary when your social circle is inexorably shrinking with each passing year? The question, I suppose, is rhetorical.
