It all began… no, not with an acquaintance, but with my arrival in the northern capital. Actually, that too was an acquaintance, not with a person, but with Russia's most beautiful city, St. Petersburg, whose famous sights I found myself here for. After strolling along Nevsky Prospekt, along the sidewalks along the canals, riding the Meteor, visiting the Hermitage and Peterhof, I fell in love with this city on the very first day! On the second day, I began to consider the possibility of staying here, and on the third, I found accommodation in the form of a rented room for 2,000 rubles in the apartment of a pre-revolutionary old lady.
I called my mom, told her I'd be a little late, and headed to the nearest internet center to look for openings. After graduating from the Faculty of Foreign Languages in Samara, the easiest job for me was as a translator or a secretary/assistant with German. But, to my deepest regret (and surprise), the northern capital didn't particularly need such specialists—after each interview, I was sent home to wait for a call, which effectively meant a rejection. Eight days of searching and interviewing had yielded no results; my energy was running low, and my money was even worse. I had to lower my salary target to find anything. But on the search results page, I was more interested in dating than in work—at the bottom of the page, a banner swirled with short profiles of men with links to dating sites. Igor, 28, Sergey, 30, Andrey, 26—and all from St. Petersburg! From that moment on, I turned my brain toward online dating.
I wanted to live in this city, but my job wasn't working out—meaning I'd have to use my diplomatic skills and good looks to achieve my goals. I immediately clicked on the link and was taken to a St. Petersburg dating site (I can't remember the name). I looked through twenty or thirty profiles, and felt a mixture of fear and excitement. After all, all my previous online dating experience had been entertainment, not a means of survival; and the fact that I needed material benefits from my dates made me something of a fraud. Then again, what's wrong with a single woman having a date in a cozy restaurant with a nice man?
When I first met them, I wasn't particularly interested in their personalities. I'd only look at their photos and age, after which I'd send a standard email along the lines of, “I liked you right away. You have an open personality, which is rare in today's world, where everyone pretends to be someone they're not.” I received a reply to every email—most likely thanks to my nice photo against the backdrop of a Sochi sunset. Incidentally, I mostly corresponded with the men I was interested in via email, as that gives me plenty of time to consider my words and actions, and the man is more likely to consider my hints and suggestions.
Things moved at lightning speed! On the third day after meeting online, a certain 26-year-old Alexey began persistently asking to meet at a very nice bar, claiming that “chatting in person is much more interesting.” Not long ago, I'd persistently rejected such offers until he gave up, but now I had no time—forgive the prosperous nature of life, I just wanted to eat something other than pasta. And since a decent girl wouldn't agree to anything the first time, I declared that I couldn't meet at seven in the evening because I wouldn't have time to eat dinner after work. Alexey was even happy about this and began persuading me to “have a wonderful dinner, almost by candlelight.” After about a minute and a half, I “gave in”!
As is customary at the beginning of a relationship, I was about ten minutes late for the meeting at Kazan Cathedral. Alexey was an average guy with no girlfriend, average looks, and average achievements, but the bar turned out to be really cozy, even nice, especially for meeting someone in person. I was very tense on the way to the meeting, but now I relaxed, as Alexey was nervous for both of us. Greek salad, chicken, and apple pie with tea set the perfect tone for my mood – I chatted so cheerfully and happily that I seemed the happiest person in the world.
Upon learning of my situation in St. Petersburg, Alexey practically started tearing at his jacket, claiming he was my only savior and that he alone could solve all my problems. Then came the talk of fate and stories about celebrities who had seemingly conspired to bring me together. I was frightened by such pressure and began insisting that I solve my problems on my own… But to no avail! As he was walking me to the metro, Alexey suggested we go to a movie in a couple of days, and half an hour after we broke up, I received a text message on my cell phone about a ten-dollar top-up. At that moment, I hated myself, reproaching myself for simply using the guy for my own gain… But, after carefully examining my actions from the moment we met to the moment we broke up, I found no crime in them—in fact, I had made it clear to the guy numerous times that I didn't need his help… Oh, to hell with it! A nice guy, pleasant conversation, a great dinner and a good mood – for a perfect evening, it would be nice to take a stroll along the evening streets of the northern capital!
I woke up the next morning a different person—no trace of the me from the day before. At ten o'clock, I headed to the internet center to continue chatting with the other guys and making new acquaintances. But this time, I was the one hinting at a quick meeting—bait like “it's boring to sit at home after work” was instantly swallowed by the men—followed by a suggestion to go out somewhere. The stronger sex was far more eager to transform the virtual acquaintance into reality. I agreed reluctantly, often citing the difficulty of getting from work to the meeting place, as there was no public transportation. Older men immediately offered to pay for a taxi; I argued a bit, then agreed, as if to ask for a favor. That morning, I tried this method for the first time—when Alexander suggested we go clubbing, I responded by citing the impossibility of getting there and back, especially since the club usually runs until three in the morning. Sasha practically begged me to come, insisting on paying for the taxi both ways—and after ten minutes of conversation, I gave in…
Naturally, I didn't take a taxi, as I could easily get there by metro. After the initial compliments and remarks about how special our meeting was, Alexander handed me an envelope of money, accepting no objections. I blushed momentarily and hid it in my bag. I was shocked by myself and my actions, but the excitement was stronger! We didn't really get to chat at the club because of the loud music, but we had a great time playing a couple of games of bowling, during which we drank champagne to celebrate our acquaintance.
Alexander knew little about me, as I did about him—he worked in the bank's credit department, 29 years old, and was unmarried. His economics studies and graduate school at Leningrad State University had replaced most of his personal life, and meeting me was a godsend (the kind of nonsense most men pull on women early on). Like Alexey, he offered to help me solve my problems, but I replied that at 22, I hadn't yet overcome my youthful maximalism and wanted to achieve everything myself, even if it wasn't working out. However, I asked if he knew where I could rent a decent apartment for about $300. Sasha promised to call his friends and acquaintances, suggested we go to the theater the following week, and bundled me into a taxi. As soon as the driver pulled away, I immediately changed the destination to my street and reduced the amount accordingly. At home, I opened the envelope, found 1,000 rubles, and smirked sarcastically—could you even call that a salary? Or the price for a pleasant acquaintance?
The first money came in handy – I was running low on groceries and internet. I decided not to relax and spent the next few days on the same schedule: breakfast, online dating, texting, setting up dates, lunch, meeting in person, date + dinner, summing up the day, including financial ones. Two days after our first date, Alexey called and suggested continuing our acquaintance at 6:00 PM by watching a romantic comedy on the big screen. I asked to reschedule the date for two hours, as I already had a meeting scheduled for that time with a 32-year-old named Ivan, who works for a company installing plastic windows. I easily used the “taxi” method from my “suburb,” which within a week became my main source of cash. The “lack of money” method on my cell phone also worked – soon I could talk on unlimited.
Now I tried to spread out our online encounters over a week or two, and only then arrange a real-life meeting. During this time, the man would fully mature, invest a lot of his time and thought into communicating with me, and was unwilling to give up, which allowed him to set any conditions he wanted.
After meeting (both online and in person) a nice guy named Ilya, a manager at a computer store, I'd heard enough about high technology to come up with another way to motivate men to give me cash. The thing is, people are much more willing to do things for themselves than for others—I tried to put him in that frame of mind. For example, after meeting him, I'd chat online for a week or two, then disappear for a few days, and when he called, I'd say my modem was broken. And not just a regular modem, but an internal one, the only one that worked properly on my bad phone line; my friend would help me buy one as soon as I got my paycheck, which would be in about three weeks. Instead of being disappointed, the guys were very happy about this, that is, they were happy that they could help me with money, and to do so, I'd have to meet them in person. And that's how it went – a date at a bar, alcohol, an offer of money, a refusal, an insistent offer of money: In the end, I agreed only because I wanted to do it his way… I wanted to passionately continue our acquaintance…
I avoided meeting Alexander, citing a lack of time due to the housing issue. In every email, I literally posed the question point-blank: either he help me find a good apartment to rent for $300, or we wouldn't be able to see each other. He must have had a lot of running around, because soon he texted me two phone numbers. One apartment was immediately ruled out because it was too far from the metro, but I arranged a viewing with the owners of the other that very day. I took the metro down the red line and saw what I expected to see—a well-kept one-room apartment, furnished and freshly renovated. I didn't hesitate for long; I paid a month's rent on the spot and received the keys from the owner.
Lilacs were blooming outside, their scent filling the room. I sank onto the couch, picked up the phone, and called my recent boyfriend, who'd promised to come running at my first cry for help. I didn't have to scream; I merely asked pointedly if he knew anyone who could help me move a few bags from my old place to the rented apartment. He did have just such a friend—himself. I found this game quite amusing. As soon as we celebrated the housewarming party and said goodbye, I immediately called Alexander and invited him to a restaurant at my own expense as a thank you. We drank French wine to celebrate the apartment and our acquaintance. Now I could afford it, since by my calculations, in one month of dating practice, I'd earned about $850, $300 of which went towards the apartment. I ate mostly on dates, and I completely forgot about the cell phone bill—I just used it. My fans received pleasant communication, and I received not only that, but also the opportunity to live in an amazing and very beautiful city.
The only remaining inconvenience was to eliminate the need to go to the internet center—it's much more pleasant to sit at a computer at home than among a group of teenagers masturbating to pornography. So, on my next date with Ilya, I complained to him and, since he works in the computer industry, asked him to find an inexpensive used laptop with minimal features. The next day, he called early and said everything was ready… I replied that I couldn't talk now, but would call back in a couple of hours… We met at the cafe where we'd recently met in person. He advertised and handed me a well-worn Toshiba laptop. When I asked about the price, he said he got it completely free (which I seriously doubted), and, what's more, it had a “dead battery.” Ilya also visited my new apartment, not as a mover, but as an electronics technician—after installing and setting up the internet, I made him some tea and told him I had to go to work and would call when I was free.
After another two months, the need for frequent encounters disappeared, as I could barely distinguish one Andrey from another, confused phone numbers, forgot appointments, and generally became a victim of my own actions. I had to cut off contact with some men because of their persistent offers to “get to know each other better,” as this wasn't my original plan. Moreover, whenever a man hinted at getting closer, I'd disappear for a couple of days to prevent him from overstepping my boundaries. The more trusting the relationship, the less a man tries to impress a woman, since his goal has already been achieved, and there's no need to try (as a rule, the average woman lets a man into her world within two weeks of meeting).
From time to time, I changed my main methods for extracting cash from men. For example, when I already had a small wholesale warehouse of fictitious modems, I came up with a new story – this time about a sick cat who had just undergone a complex operation at a veterinary clinic. The first person I decided to try this on was a kayaker and mountain hiker – I figured that a fan of wildlife and the Discovery Channel would sympathize passionately with my Cassiopeia. I told Oleg that I couldn't keep my cat, as after the operation she needed injections every four hours for a week. If I weren't strapped for cash, I'd give her to a boarding facility with high-quality care for the day. Oleg immediately declared: “Vik, if you make me your ward's godfather, I'll provide her with vacations anywhere in the world for life… In short, can you borrow money from anyone today?.. Bring the beauty to the shelter, come to Nevsky by 5:30 PM, I'll pay for the go-karting trip and child support for your mustachioed one…” I never even tried to argue with Oleg, since everything he decided, in his opinion, should be law for everyone…
In my entire life, I'd never had such a social experience as I did during those six months of nonstop dating and interaction with the opposite sex. But every day I woke up with the thought that this wasn't normal and couldn't go on. The big problem was that rarely could any job offer me as much freedom and income as dating. I decided to look for men working for German or Russian-German companies, since only foreigners in St. Petersburg could pay a decent salary. Four months later, an acquaintance (who had contacted me via ICQ) got me a job as a translator at the office of a German household chemicals manufacturer. For the first time in a long time, I felt light and stable, and decided to quit dating once and for all, which resulted in me continuing dating on my very first work evening. Dating became something between a manic hobby and a drug for me.
